Because Someone Has To Call the shots...
Our HR department has no official file on him, but if you ask Tubie he'll tell you he's calling the shots around here now.
At first we were all very skeptical of this crudely crafted drainage pipe who had been making bold claims to be Red Ledge's heir apparent. Everyone was curious to know more about this dark figure. We needed some answers, but there was just something about Tubie which was inherently intimidating.
Each of us cowered at the thought of approaching him. Finally, Chris stepped forward and bravely volunteered to make the intern confront Tubie. Many of us held our breath with anticipation as we peered from behind cubicle walls. One of us, (Haney), hid out in his car while up-to-the-minute reports of the confrontation were being relayed to him via text message. The intern walked squarely up to Tubie and demand that he reveal more information about his true identity. Nothing. Tubie didn't budge. The intern began shouting and repeatedly poked Tubie with a chopstick that someone had disposed of in a near by trash can after finishing his or her lunch. Still nothing. The shouting, poking and not budging went on for several minutes. None of us had seen anyone, man or sewage pipe, who could withstand such a savage and brutal chopstick poking.
Eventually the crowd dispersed and returned to their work, or their Myspace account. Later that same day we all received an email; it was from Tubie. It simply said...
___________________________________________________________
As heir apparent I demand that no one speak until they are spoken to first, by me.
Word to your mother,
Well to bring you up to speed, that email was sent seven weeks ago. The halls of Red Ledge have remained silent. Each day the shimmer of hope grows dimmer that Tubie will one day speak and break our curse of silence. A few of us still hold tight to the dream of yet again being able to hear the person in the cubicle next to us talking on the phone to her boyfriend about what she should get at the deli for lunch because she already had chicken for dinner last night so that's not an option. Until that day comes, we have started a blog to maintain communication and to fill the void of normal inter-personal relationships and human interaction that we all here are so desperately in need of.
Please join along with us until the day when Tubie's tyrannical rein has ceased!
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